Could I cut the rope? Thoughts on Saddam's pending execution...

Those who know me well will know that when conversation turns to politics or war I will very likely sit silently or walk away. Attempts they might make to lure me into the heated discussion will not be successful. It's not that I have no opinion on these things. In fact I do have many thoughts of my own, but I can hardly bear to let myself "go there"... so irretrievably unsettling, so deeply disturbing, so horribly divisive do I find these topics.

Over the years I've found myself unable to sleep if I watch the news before bedtime. I toss and turn things over in my head, what can I do to HELP... to bring peace, healing or goodness to a world where war, poverty, suffering and evil reap victories every day. My personal method of "attack" is to pour my attentions and efforts into small acts of caring and kindness. I don't expect to reverse the tide by flinging a single drop of water over the waves. But I do believe that in my own way, my existence CAN make the world a better place.

An old English saying goes: "For want of a nail, the shoe was lost. For want of the shoe, the horse was lost. For want of the horse, the rider was lost. For want of the rider, the battle was lost. For want of the battle, the kingdom was lost. And all for the want of a horseshoe nail!"

So yes, I do agree that small things DO matter in life.

Today there is talk of Saddam's execution possibly occurring within days or weeks. The Iraqi court upheld the ruling that sentenced him to death for the crimes he committed against his own people. He is imprisoned in an American military prison and will be turned over to Iraqi authorities just before he is to be hanged.

Prime Minister Nouri Al-Maliki has said that those who oppose the execution of Saddam are insulting the honor of his slain victims. "Nothing and nobody can abrogate the ruling," al-Maliki said. "Our respect for human rights requires us to execute him, and there will be no review or delay in carrying out the sentence."

And hearing these things I then ask myself.... Dottie, would YOU be able to cut the rope? Would you be able to execute Saddam for his crimes against humanity?

No, I couldn't do it. And dear God, I hope that does not mean that I insult the honor of his victims, or that I respect human rights any less.

I'm ashamed of myself, but I'm being completely honest. It is not my right to take the life of any other person. He needs to suffer the consequences of his atrocities, he needs to be punished. But death is too final, too absolute. What if there is something greater at stake? What if there is a higher "court" that is able to see more completely the depths of this man's heart and innermost motives. Who am I to take what I did not give? LIFE...

There are American authorities, there are Iraqi authorities... but there is also a divine authority. This is His jurisdiction I believe. Until I can see with the same all-encompassing insight and know the ultimate whole story behind Saddam's mentality and personality, I have no right to usurp the divine agenda, which is to bring light to the darkest corners of the human soul. Is it my place to cut that short? To end his life would bring an end to the workings and turnings of his human mind and soul. Perhaps in time, a miniscule pinpoint of light could penetrate the blackness of the darkness inside him. For that reason alone, I would like to see him live.

Would it not honor those he killed, Prime Minister Al-Maliki, if one day Saddam was finally able to grasp the full horrific truth of his deplorable actions and bear that burden as his own? Would this not be the best outcome for all? It's a day that might never come to pass, but then again, it could. If a Higher Authority holds this possible, who am I to say it's not?

"God forgive them, they know not what they've done."

Perhaps this might be applied to both parties... Saddam and those who would seek his execution. I don't know... but these are the thoughts that twist inside me.

Artifacts of an unused life? Questions about my clutter....

Paging through a magazine in a waiting room I stumbled upon an article... "Conquering Clutter", by David Dudley.

Clutter... it seems an endless battle, one I'm genetically programmed to lose. My father is a saver, a hoarder, a stasher, a stockpiler and a packrat. His basement and garage are jam packed to the rafters with boxes and heaps and stacks of STUFF... old stuff, parts of stuff, new unused stuff, you name it. But when something breaks, when something gets lost, he's always able to produce a replacement.

As a little girl I loved to sneak down to his workshop where I'd look, but not touch. He'd taken baby food jars, screwed the lids into the beams and filled each jar with screws, nuts, bolts and itty bitty gizmos of all kinds. At a glance he could look up and see what he needed through the bottom of the glass jar. He had things hanging and stacked everywhere, all very neat, all tools spotless and gleaming, but all so crowded.

(I loved the workshop area, dreamed of one day making things of my own there. Alas, I was a girl and never allowed. The closest I got to a power tool was to use a sewing machine or vacuum cleaner!)

Over the years, Dad's pack-ratting has taken over his house. I look at my house and all the things everywhere and wonder if it's my destiny too. He's 86, I'm 52 ... what will the next 34 years bring?

David Dudley writes... "The rarely used objects cluttering our lives are not really objects at all, but symbols of our plans and untapped potential. They are, as my father said while I hauled off a grill, 'artifacts of an unused life'."

Are all these things that create my clutter "artifacts of an unused life"? I beg to differ... I USE my clutter!

In my office (where I type this) on the desk tops are chargers for camera and phone, calculators, rolodex and a pile of files, active and pending. A stack of coins (because Steve always empties his pockets where he knows I'll find it and keep it!), a wad of Kleenex, two date books, one 2006 and one 2007, docking station for laptop, lamps, extra speakers with woofer for improved sound on this computer, other computer equipment, pictures of my kids, and three bags of fabric samples. And this is the tidy version!

My clutter seems to fall into a few categories.

* Things I'm working on.

* Things of beauty that I enjoy seeing around me.

* Things that are just part of daily life.

Dudley points out that Dante wrote about the "hoarders" and the "wasters", in his classic "Inferno". Both vices were doomed on one level of hell to battle it out. Perhaps it's the extreme, either way, that becomes our undoing.

I have too many projects, too much on my plate at any given time. I'm never bored! But I'm sometimes overwhelmed. If I'm not creating, everything in me feels out of balance. My mind needs to be always wrapped around something or someone. And so I surround myself with always a bit more than I can handle.

What if I were to complete EVERYTHING and be left with...:::gasp:::... NOTHING to do? Ha ha ha, as if that could ever happen. But deep in my psyche, I wonder if that's part of my madness. I do complete things... but always I have several books being read at once, several projects, several agendas. Why?

I'm doomed to this cycle of creating and destroying, as I create, something else (a tidy existence) is being destroyed.

Which brings me to the Designer of our universe... mathematicians, theologians and physicists debate two opposing theories, chaos vs. creation. I say that our world is the misbegotten love child of these two forces. Perhaps opposites do attract.

And perhaps I am made in the image of my Maker.